Wednesday, April 26, 2006

April 25, 2006 Don’t want to go to Coachella

Welcome backski to an almost exclamation mark free chriswasanon. This is the part of the Internest where we - Floratina mostly but I too - look I have been known ok - give you the very best bits of Steve Jones, Indie 103.1 show, "Jonesy's Jukebox." I also veer wildly like a hyper active chipmunk from subject to subject.

It looks like the US. Festival season is underway cos Coachella Valley shindig is coming up fast. But Steve doesn't want to go. Let them get their feet all muddy. Not he. Ah but this is a sunny Cally festy isn't it, this aint no Glastonbury!

The simple fact of the matter is that there does seems to be a bit of a dearth of water in that neckski of California. Not like this quagmire in Somerset.More Glasto ebay silliness available here

Ponder the admixture of water and heavily tramped soil.

The chorus to The Hippotamus song by Michael Flanders and Donald Swann.

"Mud! Mud! Glorious mud!
Nothing quite like it for cooling the blood.
So, follow me, follow, down to the hollow,
And there let us wallow in glorious mud."

The festival site turned from hardpack to liquid fudge when the rain came down in 1982 as Richie Havens belted it out from the pyramid stage. Ooooh those lasers!

"1982- The first really wet year, with festival go-ers being greeted by the heaviest rainfall for 45 years on the Friday! Spirits were lifted by sets from U2, The Thompson Twins and Gong (who were dressed in silver foil “as androids”). Also on the bill: Richie Havens, Sad Café, Roy Harper, Van Morrison, Jackson Browne, Aswad, Judy Tzuke, Steel Pulse, John Cooper Clarke, Climax Blues Band, The Blues Band, Talisman, A Certain Ratio. Price = £8. Attendance = 25,000"

Oh whaaaaaaaat? 8 quid? for 3 days.

Ya and ok we thought that was very expensive ya. Last year 2005.

"Weekend tickets cost £125.00 plus £4.00 booking fee and £4.00 postage and packing."

Attendance (officially) 153,000

Excellent Glastonbury wicked wiki here.

That was the first laser Glastonbury show and it fair blew my mind. I am looking forward to Julien Temple's Glastonbury film someday.

That's enough festival news.

---->Arse news.<-----

Still no new arse news but we do have some old arse news kicking around somewhere. Frankly disappointed by your responses so far to our sincere requests for arses (or news).

Profile myspace pic news

Steve may effect another changeroo today. He may not. That was the view from the mud encrusted chriswasanon for today. Lets see what Steve and Shovel had to say yesterday.


Tina is at the controls!

April 25, 2006 Don’t want to go to Coachella

Steve: You’re listening to Jonesy’s Jukebox on Indie 1031. Five after -four after twelve bells and it’s cold today. A bit nippy, and um…a funny ole day out. It’s a ‘neither here nor there’ kind of a day. Not buzzing with electrolytes, what do they call them things? Eons…neons? Them things that buzz around in the air…ions. That’s the one. That’s the one I’m looking for. Couldn’t feel any ions…when I walked out into the bad old world from my garage this morning, but I’m sure it can only get better. It’s only up. Ummmm, we got Cheap Trick tomorrow. That’s gonna be fun. Looking forward to that. Big fan of Cheap Trick. What else? Anything going on with you, Shovel?

Mr. Shovel: I’m gonna have to go get the ionizer and move it in here.

Steve: Yeah. We used to have one of them in here, didn’t we?

Mr. Shovel: That’s right.

Steve: What happened to that? Someone steal it? It disappeared like a lot of other things just disappear…

Mr. Shovel: It was liberated.

Steve: …in this poxy little room? I ain’t feeling any ions in here, either. (sings) Any old ions, any old ions, any any any old ions…” Oh, Mr. Shovel. What’s happening? Anything?

Mr. Shovel: All I can think about is Coachella right now.

Steve: You’re going there, right?

Mr. Shovel: Going.

Steve: Friday?

Mr. Shovel: Well, theoretically, uh…we’ll see about that.

Steve: Oh.

Mr. Shovel: Theoretically, I was planning on leaving Thursday night.

Steve: Really.

Mr. Shovel: Yeah. I gotta get some funny shorts.

Steve: Um…Coachella. I’ve got no interest. You went last year didn’t you?

Mr. Shovel: Mmm hmm.

Steve: You enjoyed it.

Mr. Shovel: Mm hmm.

Steve: Did you have all the…this pass and that pass and was you looked after? Pretty painless for you?

Mr. Shovel: Yeah.

Steve: Cos I can’t deal with uh…

Mr. Shovel: What, even what I had, you wouldn’t have liked.

Steve: It wasn’t…

Mr. Shovel: Because it involved standing.

Steve: Right…

Mr. Shovel: You know...

Steve: If it ain’t four pygmies carrying me around on a sedan chair, then I’m not interested.

Mr. Shovel: Yeah. I didn’t get that level of pass.

Steve: Yeah. Then I have no need for uh, Coachella. Um, should I blow my horn?

Mr. Shovel: Please do.

(Steve plays his guitar and harmonica and sings)

Coachella you can shove it up your bum
I’d rather a Panatella
Sitting at home watching Fox Sports
In the sun

I tell ya
I have no need for a backstage pass
Oh no
Coachella I just have to tell ya
I’ve got no need for your rock and roll bands
in the sun

Give me a fruitella
Oh, I tell ya
(to Mr. Shovel) What does that mean?

Mr. Shovel: It’s just a place…it’s a place.

Steve: Oh, it is?

Mr. Shovel: The Coachella Valley. What if they asked the Pistols to play and they paid you a lot of money?

(Steve continues singing)

If the Pistols play at Coachella
I’d need one million dollars for that gig
But they wouldn’t pay us a million dollars
because we only know fourteen songs
Do you know what I mean

They’re good songs, but
Coachella shove it up your
Elbow bella (?) yeah
You know what I’m talking about mister

Give it to me
(plays some more on the harmonica)

The end

1 comment:

ChispaFilthyLucre said...

another big song from
what can I say? thank,
thank from a simple man