Monday, April 24, 2006

April 21. 2006 Seed the clouds...

Welcome back to Chriswasanon. Well now chums what has been happening since you lot were last here that we can fill ye thirsty maws with?

Cap’n Steve has given another load of land lubbers the push-off. Those Larry Lightweights never linger long. 10 former shipmates have gorn to the bottom. “Harrrh Harrrrh.” It’s Stevey Jones locker probly. To follow this up, Steve then threatened by way of a nasty proclamation to add NO ONE new to his myspace friends. Not a sausage. So nip in sharpish and keep him in your top 8 when you have...before the gates of Heaven are firmly barred agin ye.

Up to date Profile pic news.

T’was a simple guitar and an amp pic that replaced the well-loved one of Cookie's un clad arse and naughty bits on Steve's myspace. C’mon, whaddaya think I am, some kind of nut? That I religiously watch for Pontifical pictorial metamorphoses. Me? So now it’s tracksuitery and now...its that other one again.

Latest Arse News.


Sorry there is no arse news today. Send some in! But then…of course you know. You understand.

Moany faced git news.

I was greatly heartened to read that Mcdonalds are closing 25 stores in the UK! The young here are beginning to associate Mcdonald's with "uncool" apparently. So that's a regular fries and a supersize Mcmiserable, please. The golden arches are becoming tarnished.

And now the bit you've all been waiting for..

But what has Tina set out for us today? Steve and Shovel may or may not be plotting on a new form of mind control to confuse LA. with some marmalising psyops energy. Stuff and nonsense. Watch the skies LA. Yeah right. Think paranoia paradise basically. Well it's always the day before a rainy day. Oh yes? It's teeming here tonight we are talking cats and we are. I think it is utter nonsense and cac mor dubh to even speculate on the merest preposition of seeds in the clouds. In a word preposterous. See that criss-cross pattern of contrails in the blue yonder? They are just aireybuzzers making pretty fluffy stratospheric streaks. And these grown men carry on, I mean how can anybody...possibly in this the 21st Century after all believe in such a load of fuxxxx.ZZZZZZZZZZAAAAP.

You poor pitiful foolish protoplasmic Earth creature known as "cwa". It can finally be revealed to you that we ARE in control. Yes, it has been that alone that makes this biped of skin and bone (ie. cwa) sit by this lowly primitive communication device. Even when the Jones blog worked. My masters! (cwa has really lost it this time). Cwa's brain has been co opted and he now (this should be read out quite loud actually in a faltering metallic voice) “will- work- tirelessly for- a higher-cause- out- there- where- your –puny- pathetic- fossil- fuel- driven- craft- can- never- reach.”

To you it is only the "weather news" but to is the beginning of the New Alien Century.


Tina is at the controls!

April 21. 2006

Steve: You’re listening to Jonesy’s Jukebox on Indie 1031 on a lovely Friday, about sixty-five degrees, maybe some rain later. Who knows?

Mr. Shovel: I’m guessing so cos yesterday I saw them seeding the clouds again.

Steve: What does that mean? Seeding?

Mr. Shovel: Yeah.

Steve: Who?

Mr. Shovel: You ever look up at the sky and you see a crisscross pattern of vapor trails?

Steve: Yeah.

Mr. Shovel: Every time that happens, it rains after.

Steve: What is that, though Shovel? Is…that really like, chemical trails, whatever they call them. What is that? Is that like a real thing or…

Mr. Shovel: I don’t know for sure, I’m just saying, every time I see that, it rains the next day.

Steve: But they’re always up with them things. I thought it was just the smoke off of planes.

Mr. Shovel: In a crisscross grid over the city.

Steve: Do you think…oh who knows. Another conspiracy…

Mr. Shovel: Just raising speculation.

Steve: Conspiracy, conspiracy fears. It couldn’t just be possibly the exhaust from jets?

Mr. Shovel: Yeah, that could be that, too.

Steve: But it’s probably mind control powder, more to the truth.

Mr. Shovel: Dummy powder.

Steve: That’s what I reckon. Sprayin’ L.A. – I’m the one who sprays L.A., not bleedin’ jet planes. Do you understand?

Mr. Shovel: Yes sir.

Steve: That’s correct.


Steppin' up The flying saucers attack!

A Joint Tina and chriswasanon production from the Planet Zog.

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