“The Great Rock ‘n’ Roll Swindle.” 1. Steve - “I was only in it for the birds after the show” - Jones and Julien Temple discuss the film.

Welcome back to chriswasanon. First we had the Great Piespace Swindle on cwa blog and now we have another teaser for you. The Great Rock ‘n’ Roll Swindle. Part 1 and er part 2. Part 2 to up step tomorrow or Sunday.

The Embezzler, The Crook, The Gimmick, The Collaborator, etc.

Wonderful sequences! Terrific animation and not a CGI muppet in sight!

Eh: You need haaaaands!

The TrAnsCrIber and I have been looking over the rushes, I been proofing this slab after Tina tapped it out and shipped it . It’s Fresh! LA.--------------------------->UK.

This interview was first broadcast on Indie 103.1 LA and OC area and sprayed over the Interweb on 23.3.06. Yesterday!

Tina is at the controls.



Steve: You're listening to Jonesy's Jukebox on Indie 1031 on a gorgeous...I can't believe how hot it is. It was eighty degrees as I was pulling in the garage...almost eighty, and it will be in a little bit. Just couldn't be happier. Couldn't be happi-er. But besides all that we have Julien Temple in the studio. How are you, Julien?

Julien: I'm good. (referring to the Jonesy's Jukebox opening theme, the orchestral version of "God Save The Queen" from The Great Rock and Roll Swindle) I'm surprised how well...it's it amazing how well that song blew up to orchestral...

Steve: I'm sure you've heard that song a million times, right?

Julien: I hear it in my...nightmares, yes.

Steve: Do you? (both laugh) If none of you don't know it, Julien was, uh, the director of The Rock and Roll Swindle.

Julien: Steve was my leading man.

Steve: Yes, I'm the...I was the leading man, star-man. Did you have fun doing that? Or was it, was it...

Julien: Uh, not really. It was a nightmare. By that stage, everything was a bit of a nightmare. But, you know, it was a survival course. You had to stay the course or give up for the rest of your life, basically.

Steve: Yeah. What did uh, did you...it, it was a nightmare as far as dealing with Malcolm Mclaren, or just, it...it was a shambles, wunnit? I mean nothing...it wasn't run like a normal movie.

Julien: We didn't have money one day to the next, you know. You'd wait for six weeks to then find out you'd got a little bit of money, which is probably your money in the first place, but I don't know where it came from. Um, it was, you know, it was blood on the walls already at that stage, though. I mean, the whole thing with John and Malcolm was, was pretty bitter, wasn't it?

Steve: Right.

Julien: ...and, you know, I was making it with Malcolm but I wanted to be trying to keep some kind of truth to, to the input of Rotten and the band, particularly. Ah, and in a way, you know, looking at the two films together, I think it works quite well because you've, you've got two sides to the story there because The Filth And The Fury obviously made with a bit more hindsight, a bit more space between things. You could tell the story in a different way, a more human way.

Steve: Yeah.

Julien: At the time, the, the Swindle was a kind of provocation. It was meant to enrage, annoy everybody. It was a very "punk" film in that sense and making cartoons of you at that time was a sacrilege, wasn't it? I mean now...you have to be a cartoon to be in a band. Back then, rock and roll stars, or rock and roll characters portrayed as a cartoon was not what you were meant to do, so hopefully it was irreverent and in the spirit of the times...you know, for whatever it is, it's a document of the...

Steve: I think, I, I love watching it. It makes no sense, but I love it. It's just the things that are going on in it, you know, one minute you're, you know, the Brazil bit and you know, it's just, its...its great having Ronnie Biggs in the movie. For me, that was...it's just like one of them mad Carry On movies, to me.

Julien: Yeah, yeah, it is.

Steve: A Carry On movie on acid, or something, you know? It's just out there.

Julien: I think it's good 'cause it did leave a good monument to Sid, what Sid was in it, 'cause in the band he didn't really, didn't really work in as a Sex Pistol on stage, I thought. But when, when he did My Way, he did get a real, real sense of who he was.

Steve: Yeah, Chrissie was saying that yesterday, that he was, if he would have had his, his stuff together, he could have went on to be...

Julien: Huge.

Steve: Yeah. He had it. He had, he had the charisma and he had a voice, too.

Julien: But he lost it though, didn't he?

Steve: The voice?

Julien: He lost it...he had it and then he lost it.

Steve: Well, only through substances. I don't think it was a...

Julien: That's what I mean...

Steve: Yeah.

Julien: Before that all started happening, he was you know...electric guy in a room. There was something really charismatic about Sid.

Steve: I think it was pretty sad when he ended up in CBGB's. Did you ever hear any of them tapes when he performed there?

Julien: Seen some stills of that. I haven't heard the music.

Steve: Yeah, it was pretty sad. What a mess he was there. What was it like working with him, 'cause you did a lot of stuff by yourself with him, didn't you, when he's doing the bit on the back of the bike...you weren't really driving the bike, right, it was being...

Julien: It was on a flat trailer...

Steve: ...you could tell...from a mile away! (laughs) I don't think he'd ever been on a motorcycle in his life.

Julien: Well, in a way, if you had a bag of sweets, you were all right with Sid, you know, 'cause...you forget how young he was also, you know...and ah, the problem was not what he did when you were filming him, it was getting him out of bed and getting him towards the camera, you know, just getting things set up and ah, I always found a bag of Humbugs or something...

Steve: Smarties. (both laugh) "'ere ya are, Sid, here's your Smarties!" Ah, boy. Yeah, I was...I wasn't in too great a shape when I was doing it. I might have acted like I was together, but I was uh, that's when I started doing that nasty drug.

That was an EmBeZzler Tina and chriswasanon production.

Thanks to Pauly Poo for the image!

Steppin up part 2.

Chrissie Hynde...Higher beings

Welcome back to chriswasanon! Julian Temple today??? Would that we could have a machine that did the transcribing for us. By the power of the mind alone! Wouldn't that be something? Well what we gots for you is the old mechanical methodology from Tina's transcriptorium...Its the show from yesterday noon (US. Westies) Yesterday evening (UK.) Yes last night! It's what we like to refer to in the politest of circles as a "spoiler." I'm not sure of this one's destination currently but spoiler or no spoiler, I've selectified a little gobbet of Steve and Chrissie to lay out in a little pre Julian Temple "a pair of teef" for you.


This extract originates from the show with Chrissie Hynde guesting on Jonesy's jukebox with Miss Rosanna Arquette popping in too but she isn't steppin' up in this extract...yet. A show hosted by our very lovely and extraordinaryly excellent Interplanetary super being Capt. Steven Jones of the starship "How dare you defy!" It's 5 billion year mission etc...The show was broadcast over Indie 103.1 in the Los Angeles area and over the interwebbery on March 22. 2006. Is that fresh? Fresh as it can come really. Plus fresh enough to have possible minor errors too but on this 2 and 3/3rds monitor... forgive us...sob. I hads a nice imagery planned too but that hasn't worked out.


FIRST MEGA TEASER!!!

Tina is at the controls...

Chrissie Hynde Visits The Box March 22, 2006


Steve: Chrissie Hynde in the studio, ladies and gentlemen. Is you “Miss” Chrissie Hynde, now, or are you Mrs. Chrissie Hynde?

Chrissie: (laughs) I’ve married myself. What do you mean, am I “Miss” Chrissie Hynde?

Steve: Well, didn’t you get married a couple of times?

Chrissie: Yeah.

Steve: You’re not married anymore, though, are you?

Chrissie: No. No, I’m not really marriage material.

Steve: So, when you…

Chrissie: They all want me back, of course…

Steve: Riiiight. So when…

Chrissie: …as you can well I’m sure, vouch for that.

Steve: Yes. So when, when we uh, when we ummm, had sex, many years ago…we did, right?

Chrissie: Well…

Steve: I remember…

Chrissie: I think when I didn’t have a place to live and I used to come around to the studio on Denmark, I think you used to give me one.

Steve: Yeah, but I remember another spot as well. It was at a party in the bathroom. I remember that, too. What, I was that good, you don’t remember?

Chrissie: It was that good?

Steve: Even I remember.

Chrissie: Do you know what I remember about that party, was there was a…like a turkey or a chicken and I ate a piece of it. I still remember that ‘cause of course you know, it was a huge violation for me, but I was so hungry and after what I’d just…been up to in the bathroom with you, I thought, you know, I was already working with The Man Downstairs and I thought, “Fuck the chicken.” (Mr. Shovel has to hit the dump button at this point) Sorry! (for the expletive)

Steve: She can’t help herself. (sings) She’s a rebel and she’s never ever any good!
(both laugh)

Chrissie: Well, we got off to a good start.

Steve: That’s fine with me.

Chrissie: So, I saw Lemmy last night.

Steve: Did he come to your show?

Chrissie: Yeah. And I thought, isn’t it ironic how we’ve all become respectable?

Steve: Yeah…

Chrissie: Well, I was always respectable, but like, you guys...

Steve: Yeah, I guess so.

End of extract....................................................................

SECOND MEGA TEASER.

Tina at the controls.

Steve: You came from Akron, Ohio.

Chrissie: Yeah, to, to London.

Steve: You came straight from there to King’s Road.

Chrissie: Yeah.

Steve: Right.

Chrissie: And that’s the first time I saw all the piercings and stuff, started piercing my ears and stuff.

Steve: Do a lot of people recognize you as coming from that era, like, when they talk to you? They, do they, ‘cause you were like, right there before it even happened. Do people know?

Chrissie: Yeah. Well, I knew you before the Pistols got you.

Steve: Yeah, I know. We used to go to them pubs and watch bands.

Chrissie: Um hmm.

Steve: What was that pub down the end…

Chrissie: The Roebuck. No…

Steve: Down the end of a road, off a, ‘round back of a…Olympia. It was down a long road and there was a pub down the end. We saw The Winkies in there. Remember The Winkies? Or was it Judy Nylon…

Chrissie: Don’t remember…

Steve: Maybe it was Judy Nylon.

Chrissie: Don’t remember.

Steve: So, when you worked in there, was it Malcolm and Vivienne or was it just Malcolm?

Chrissie: Yeah, I didn’t last very long, though. There was that incident with Nick Kent and the belt and then they fired me.

Steve: He, he whacked you, didn’t he?

Chrissie: Yeah.

Steve: Swine.

Chrissie: It’s okay. I got some good lines out of it.

Steve: Do you still…

Chrissie: I see him now.

Steve: How’s he doing?

Chrissie: Good. He’s got a little…

Steve: Is he respectable?

Chrissie: Yeah, he is. He’s got a little uh, place in Paris and he’s got a beautiful wife, nice kid and he, you know, just rolls spliffs and watches DVDs and writes.

Steve: Is he still uh…

Chrissie: No, he’s pretty cleaned up.

Steve: He’s not dressing like he’s Keith Richards anymore?

Chrissie: Yeah, he wears that kind of wife-beater shirt and you know, earring, beret…you know, he’s got this kind of French thing going now.

Steve: He’s gone off the Keith thing.

Chrissie: Little bit.

Steve: Is he still really skinny?

Chrissie: Not as skinny as he was. Not like you, Steve. I see you’ve maintained your svelte physique...

......................................................

That was just a little taster - we don't have the full show by any means yet. But it was a Tina and chriswasanon quick teasing production in telepathovision TM.


Special day shouts out from the chriswasanon team to SF.GAIL!

Twas on the good ship...

Welcome back to chriswasanon, BLOGSTARS!!! non blogstars, dissenters, even those who've been chucked over the side by Steve in his abiding search for perfection over at myspace. You may well have been marooned with just a cheese fixation to content you after being given the black spot - well here be TREASURE of another sort.

You ain't so great, if he ain't in YOUR top 8. You may wish to refresh yourself over the top 8 myspace deletions - don't know what myspace is??? - get outta here! "Learn more" - hah, by having a deek go here.

OK well got that? Did you know that Jonesy recruited a blogstar espionage force to do the plank walking...too. So watch your step on the deck. Don't forget before the boat leaves that Chrissie Hynde is guesting on the jukebox today!

OK. Lets steer the ship out of the haven now. Tina has sent by a large seagull another scroll of transcription that we think that you will enjoy. So without further but just to mention that this was broadcast on Indie 103.1 in the LA and OC. area and across the Internet on March 21, 2006. Is that bang up to date? We gives you the Midas Touch or Oedipus Gluten or any title you like really. We've cast off and have got a stiff South Westerley behind us and the open sea before us

Tina is at the helm.

Glutenous Maximus?

Steve: You’re listening to Jonesy’s Jukebox on Indie 103 onnnnnne. A lovely Tuesday, five after twelve bells, it’s just an unbelievable, gorgeous day today after the rain. Can’t get enough of it. It’s not quite up to my temperature liking, but it is beautiful. It’s like Hawaii with them little clouds and the clear, smogless. Fantastic. Just don’t want it to end. Just wanna tell everyone about the weather when it’s like this. Just wanna be out there, just cradled by Mother Nature. Just rocked to sleep by Mother Nature. Wunderbar, wunderbar.

I went to a stupid fashion show last night, well not…I think it’s stupid but it was my friend’s. Agent Provocateur had a fashion show. Lot of skinny models with no asses, prancing around, up and down the runway; had asses like marshmallows. Not attractive, to my mind’s eye. My third eye didn’t appreciate the skinniness of the paleness of the asslessness. And they’re so funny ‘cause their gear is kind of like…a lot of Fifties style: neutral-colored stocking with the line up the back and very Forties and Fifties – which them birds were like more, hourglasses. You know, like bubble butts, strong legs, nice calves, little waists, natural knockers. Yeaaaah. And they had these scrawny birds who got like they just got out of Auschwitz, prancing up and down with marshmallow asses. I was most disappointed. But it was ah, it was fun.

I love Joe and Serena. They’re uh, that’s who owns Agent Provocateur. I actually…Joe, when he first…Joe is Joe Corre who’s Vivienne Westwood’s son…and Malcolm’s son. Which is ironic, really ‘cause when Malcolm was messing around with Let It Rock and was turning it into Seditionaries and Sex, I was driving him around to all these tailors, getting material in the East End of London. And when Joe was starting Agent Provocateur, like twenty years later, he came to L.A. and I was driving him around looking for high-heeled shoe shops downtown and you know, people who make panties and stuff. Isn’t that bizarre?

Mr. Shovel: But, isn’t that what you normally do?

Steve: I have The Midas Touch…and I don’t get rewarded for it. I’m not doing it any more, I’m not driving anyone around, making them happen. (strums guitar)

No, it’s all good. It’s all good. I think there’s a song in there…hold on though, before I write a song...it was such a mad house with all these mongoloids with their cameras down there fighting. I was sitting next to Cher almost, with my friend(s) Laurie and Richard and uh, it was just a nightmare. All these phony baloneys down there. Oh, I don’t know. So I got so angry I thought, “I’m gonna show them” and I went to a restaurant and I ate a loaf of bread. I showed them! I went into a coma afterwards, by the way. I got a big bowl of pea soup with some vinegar in it and a loaf of bread and butter and I was eating away my anguish. About twenty minutes later, when I was driving down the street, I looked at my stomach. It looked like I swallowed a um, one of them balls that knocked down buildings, demolition balls. It’s so…wheat is like the devil to me, I’m telling ya, I’m so allergic to it, it’s not even funny. My whole stomach was uh, a molehill. Just disgusting. It was like doing heroin, eating that loaf of bread, to me. That’s what it was like. I was so hungry as well, that didn’t help. Don’t want to get in that position again, don’t want to make a habit of that. I’ll be back to the Michelin Man again, if I carry on, eating the bread. (begins to strum his guitar again) But I think there’s a song there, don’t you think, Shovel?

Mr. Shovel: Yeah. I need people to know what you’re looking like at this moment, because you have the acoustic guitar, the harmonica holder. You’ve got this Fifties beatnik hat and horn rimmed glasses.

Steve: DARK horn rimmed glasses.

Mr. Shovel: I’m getting ready to turn you in as a communist.

Steve: Um, yeah, okay. So, is there a song there? What do you think this song is about, Mister Shovel? (sings) I’ll bet you think this song is about you don’t you, don’t you?
I’m waiting…

Mr. Shovel: Wheat.

Steve: and lingerie?

Mr. Shovel: Lingerie…communists.

Steve: Okay. (begins to play his guitar, then his harmonica)

Wheat
Communists and lingerie
Communists
Lingerie and wheat

I don’t know what to say
but the wheat has it’s way with me
I don’t know what to pray about
the wheat and the communist way?

Lingerie on a tray
like my mother used to wear
With the pencil up the back
I see my mommy with the lingerie (laughs)

But I don’t know how to pray about
my mother in her lingerie
No, I’m not one to pray
about my mommy in her lingerie

My mommy was a communist
that’s what she’d say
My mum was…

(Mr. Shovel has now seized upon a voicemail recording that Mrs. Jones, mother of our beloved host, left for her son several months earlier and now he is sampling it so her voice is interspersed throughout the rest of the song)

(Mrs. Jones: “Hello, this is Mummy”)

a communist but she gave it up

(Mrs. Jones: Hello?)

that’s what she said

(Mrs. Jones: Hello, this is Mummy”)

Take it away, Mummy

(Mrs. Jones: I want to know how my little baby’s getting on. Bye!)

Steve: One more time, Mr. Shovel

(Mrs. Jones: Hello? Hello, this is Mummy. I want to know how my little baby’s getting on. Bye!)

Steve: Talk to you later, Mummy
‘cause I don’t know what to say about
my Mummy and the lingerie

(Mrs. Jones: Bye!)

Steve: Hey, hey

(Mrs. Jones: Bye!)

Steve: You know I’m not one to pray
about my mummy and her lingerie

(Mrs. Jones: Bye!)

have a nice day

Sausages, pork pies and
luncheon meat

(Mrs. Jones: This is Mummy…)

hard boiled eggs
pickled onions
That’s what she fed me

(Mrs. Jones: Hello…Bye!)

Oh, Mummy
why couldn’t you take me
to a vegan restaurant

(Mrs. Jones: Hello…Bye!)

Soy beans and Satan
is what your little boy needed (Steve laughs)

(Mrs. Jones: Hello…Bye!)

Tofu and all that
phony baloney
bacon

(Mrs. Jones: Bye!)

Joint Floratina and Chriswasanon production.

Steve and Shovel "Can you put me on the guest list.?"

Welcome back to chriswasanon from a bright and sunny neothological S.W. corner of Scotland. The TrAnsCriber has cooked up another little goodie for you all. I've been to a gig right?...a concert and there I've stood at the door hanging onto something to stop the place from spinning around and now I come to think of it, I have said this more times than beans make five.

"I'm the Pontifex Maximus, you may kiss my ring!"

I am informed that this one went out over Indie. 103.1 radio LA. and OC. and other places in and around Los Angeles and A X the Inter rent on March 20. 2006.

Tina is at the controls...

Steve: You’re listening to Jonesy’s Jukebox on Indie 1031 on a kind-of-not-sure kind of weather today. Not sure if it’s gonna rain or shine. I’d lay money on a bit of moisture today. Wanna bet, Mr. Shovel it's gonna rain?

Mr. Shovel: No, I don’t…because I think it’s gonna.

Steve: Yeah? Did you have a word with your dad?

Mr. Shovel: Yes.

Steve: The neothologist? (sic)

Mr. Shovel: He told me a low pressure system is coming through, with the cumulonimbus clouds.

Steve: Hmm, fantastic. Um, we’ve got Todd…we’ve got the new Cars coming in at one o’clock, which is Todd Rundgren and I think, about two…at least two originals from The Cars. That’ll be fun, do a bit of jamming. I’m looking forward to that. Um mum mum…ooh mao mao mum mum ooh mao mao…(to Mr. Shovel) What?

Mr. Shovel: What’s that on your pinky?

Steve: I think they’re called, “rings”.

Mr. Shovel: You’ve got a pinky ring.

Steve: Yes. It’s a John Gotti special. It’s gold, with a diamond in the middle. Do you want to kiss it?

Mr. Shovel: No.

Steve: Why? Am I embarrassing you? Everyone else has kissed it.

Mr. Shovel: Yeah?

Steve: You have no interest?

Mr. Shovel: No.

Steve: Aw, Mr. Shovel. When are you gonna come around? (both laugh)

Mr. Shovel: You’ve got to get a couple of drinks in me, Steve.

Steve: How was uh, your, your adventure to South By Northeast?

Mr. Shovel: Yeah, we had a blast in Austin, for sure.

Steve: Yeah?

Mr. Shovel: Yup.

Steve: See a lot of bands?

Mr. Shovel: Saw a lot of bands, saw a lot of people. Didn’t see a lot of bands that we wanted to see ‘cause uh, it’s hard to get in everywhere. Saw the Pretenders on Saturday night.

Steve: Who was in the band, do you know?

Mr. Shovel: Well, uh Chrissie and uh, the original drummer, Martin Chambers. The other two guys obviously weren’t there. The original guys, they’re dead. The guys playing were great, I don’t know who they were.

Steve: Hmm. She’s playing at the House of Pancakes, Tuesday and Wednesday.

Mr. Shovel: That’s right.

Steve: Hopefully we can get her in here Wednesday. I would love to have her on The Box. Got the Sparks coming in tomorrow. Tomorrow’s their release date of their new album. We’re gonna be jamming with the Sparks. So it’s looking like its going to be one of them busy weeks.

Mr. Shovel: Excellent.

Steve: I hope so. We are starting to film shows now, out of my own pocket. I’ve hired some people, gonna film the shows and try and turn The Box…

Mr. Shovel: You know, I’m a member of SAG.

Steve: Yeah?

Mr. Shovel: Yeah.

Steve: So what’s that mean?

Mr. Shovel: Means you’ve got to pay me.

Steve: Yeah?

Mr. Shovel: Yeah.

Steve: You leave. I’ll get someone else to do it then.

Mr. Shovel: Okay.

Steve: It’s easier.

Mr. Shovel: All right.

Steve: You still want to be paid?

Mr. Shovel: Yeah.

Steve: See ya later.

Mr. Shovel: Okay bye.

Steve: Can you, can you…Ollie, can you man the boards? Do you know how to work a board here?

Mr. Shovel: It’s actually video, it’s not film.

Steve: It’s none of your business what it is. I’m talking to you, Ollie. Can you…

Ollie: (in background, indecipherable)

Steve: Okay, we’ll figure it out, in a minute. Let’s wait until Mr. Shovel starts the show, then we’ll kick him out. So, Pretenders…Morrissey played, right?

Mr. Shovel: Yup.

Steve: and uh…

Mr. Shovel: Beastie Boys did a show. There was a lot of great bands, you know, not huge bands playing. That’s the thing there, it’s a lot of bands, you know, kind of…new bands or bands that are just coming around and getting known. Spinto Band was great.

Steve: Splinter Band?

Mr. Shovel: Spinto. Lotta just…so many bands playing at once, you couldn’t get to everything.

Steve: Yeah. It’s like at Disneyland. You can’t get on every ride.

Mr. Shovel: Right. You just spend most of the day standing in line.

Steve: Yeah. You had to stand in line?

Mr. Shovel. No. We spent most of out time texting people going, “Where you at?” “Where you at?” “Where you at?”. “Gotta get us in” “Gotta get us in” “Can’t get in, gotta get us in!”

(Steve begins strumming his guitar)

Steve: There must be a song in there somewhere. (plays some more) Isn’t there?

Mr. Shovel: It’s called, “I’m On The List, But There’s No List”...

Joint. Tina and Chriswasanon production with more to follow? Check back often!